the past, she is sneaky in the ways she chooses to haunt

I’ve been in a lot of plays in my life. Typically never musicals, because I am against singing in public. I don’t care if you sing in public, but I’m not going to sing in public, and it’s for a good reason too, I assure you. Anyway, there are few things in life that are as awesome as performing in live theater, because it’s a great big giant rush. I have many fond memories of live performances and rehearsals and backstage hijinks. I have some less-than-fond memories too, of course, because it goes with the territory, but overall I have to say that even though it was always a lot of work, I had a lot of fun. I haven’t been in a play for a couple of years now and I do miss it sometimes, but I just keep not going on auditions. So it goes. This particular post is about a play way way way back in my high school years when I was a very dramatic teenager.

For his Eagle Scout project, my friend Matt directed a play. I was in 10th grade and Matt was in 11th grade and we were around each other all the time. Partly because we were always in a play of some sort, but also because we were both very dramatic teenagers. So when Matt said he was directing a play, of course I was going to be in the play, though I was less than excited about the whole musical aspect of it, seeing as how I did not want to sing. Matt worked it out so I did not have to audition (was I a prima donna much? perhaps) and in the spring of my 10th grade year, we started rehearsals. Oh? The play? It was called Wanna Play?!? and it’s a good play for kids, which we all were. (Though if you had called me a kid when I was 15 I might have scowled you to death.) There was a lot of singing (because it was a musical, natch) and it was divided up into short, song-length vignettes that were mostly about things that go on in the lives of children, like getting braces. And there was one about parents getting a divorce. And stuff like that. In one scene, there was a boy who was in love with his computer and the computer was dressed up like Mae West. Guess who played the computer? That’s right. Me. I had to wear a box on my head, with a hole cut out for my face. The box wouldn’t stay put, so it was actually held in place with a wad of duct tape in my hair. Ripping the box off after the scene was over? Always a very pleasant experience, to be sure.

Anyway, there was this song at the end. I think it was, in fact, the closing number though maybe there was one afterwards? My memory is a little bit hazy on this point. Anyway, the song started out as a duet between me and another girl and then the rest of the cast came out and there was some dancing and I believe that jazz hands were involved. The song was called “Say Yes” and with a title like that, you might be surprised to learn that it was a song about the benefits of saying yes instead of no. Yeah. I’ve forgotten how the song goes, though I remember bits and pieces. Mainly I remember the end. I don’t remember all the words to the end of the song, but bear with me. It kind of goes like this. I have included a drawing:

So that’s kind of what was going on onstage. And at this point, everyone is onstage and everyone is singing. Everyone is singing the following (or a reasonable facsimile thereof):

Everyone:
Don’t say no
It’s so
Darn negative
And the life you live
Will be oh
So blessed
When yessed
And I suggest it!

(And then there’s talking.)

Fellow Performer Named Lica: We said yes to this song
Me: And it’s really divine.
FPNL: Lo and behold…
Together: It’s… A CHORUS LINE! 5! 6! 7! 8!

(And then there’s a bit of dancing.)

Together: That’s enough!

(And then more singing.)

Everyone:
Say yes!
Go ahead!
Say yes!
Green not red!
Don’t get into a mess!
Don’t ya settle for less!
You’ll advance
Take a (stance? I don’t remember)
Take a chance on success!
Say yes!
…
Say yes!
…
Say yes!

Jazz hands.

Aaaaaaand scene.

I’m not telling you this so that you can be amused by the thought of a teenage me with pigtails in my hair, wearing bright colors and singing this song onstage. Though I understand it is amusing enough as it is. It was amusing back then, too. Trust me. The reason why I’m telling you this is because the song won’t get out of my head. It’s been, you know, a few years since this performance took place and I have been just fine for all of those years with no Wanna Play?!? side effects. But then I saw this movie trailer:

And now, all bets are off. The song won’t go away. I went to bed last night with the song in my head. I woke up this morning with the song in my head. Maybe a little while ago when I was in my kitchen pouring some cereal into a bowl I was dancing. Maybe I can’t stop doing jazz hands. Maybe. May. Be. Now, I understand that if you don’t know the tune of this song — and let’s face it, you probably don’t — you are unable to grasp the fullness of the bright, cheery horror that is playing manically and on repeat in my brain right now, and I apologize (okay, I don’t really apologize) because I’m not going to sing it to you.

Because if you did in fact watch that trailer did you realize that the movie doesn’t open until Christmas? That’s three months from now. I don’t think I can take this for three months. Help me. I may be going crazy. Help meeeeeee.