From ykw:
What’s your biggest turn on?
Hm. There are all all kinds of things that are deadly attractive — wit, intelligence, warmth. Gentlemanliness. (Is that even a word? Firefox says no. But I think it has to be.) “The Cinnamon Peeler” by Michael Ondaatje. “The Rain” by Robert Creeley. “Soneto XVI” by Pablo Neruda. The theme of those last three would be, I suppose, words used well. Once, a long time ago, on a former incarnation of this blog that no longer exists, I wrote a post about terrible pet names, or terms of endearment that are in no way endearing, and I remember in the comments, there was a tangent about being called “Darlin’” and how that is impossibly hot. If I recall correctly (and there’s no way to check, so you just have to take my word for it), I didn’t even bring it up, but I agreed — it is impossibly hot. I remember a post Sarah Brown wrote about this word, and I agree that it has to come naturally, that it can’t be a matter of saying “I would like it if you called me ‘darlin’” because then it’s inherently false. When it comes to pet names, I usually get stuck with “princess” which does nothing for me, really, but it seems to happen a lot. Is this a tangent? I suppose. To bring it back to the point, I can hear the impossibly hot version of this word in my head, drawled just slightly. Of course it doesn’t have to be impossibly hot, the word “darlin.’” It can just be friendly. But in the right context, in the right way, it’s practically deadly.
I’m sensing a word theme.
I suppose that really, when it comes down to it, it’s a combination of things happening simultaneously that lead to a reaction of “Yow.” But if I’m going to pick one thing, then, I guess I’ll abandon my word theme and say it has to be hands. Masculine hands. Because, um, heh. Because. You know how you might be having a conversation with someone and then you notice something (like, say, hands) and then your mind wanders a little sideways and you end up thinking “Well, damn”? It’s like that.
Biggest turn off?
Smarminess. It’s so gross. Also, ill-fitting pants.
For me, I don’t know if ill-fitting pants are necessarily a turn OFF (thought I will question them – it depends on the way in which they are ill-fitting), but nice fitting pants are definately a turn ON.
Posted by Cheryl | November 20, 2009, 8:17 amI’m always a tad surprised by the reaction of people to Darlin’. Since my roots are Irish and Southern, and since both Irish and Southern folk toss the term around rather indiscriminately, I use it all the time. Or at least I used to.
I don’t use it very often since I’ve returned to the Midwest because Midwesterners react to it oddly. Now I mostly only use it with folks I know and like.
Posted by greg | November 20, 2009, 4:00 pmCheryl — Ill-fitting pants. I just can’t DEAL. It reminds me of a story (of course it reminds me of a story) but it would take entirely too long to write. To sum up: It’s nice that you’re proud of your package, I suppose, but THAT IS NOT NECESSARY.
greg — Most of the time, darlin’ is just a word. But sometimes… oh god. I hope that clears it up.
Posted by jamelah | November 20, 2009, 5:56 pm