Oct 29 2002
83752329
the worst day of my life
i wish i had it in me right now to make this sarcastic and funny, but i don’t. i’m tired. and it’s a different kind of tired. sleepy, yes. but more. weary. i am absolutely weary. and i should be too young for this kind of overwhelming weariness, but what can i do? that’s where i am.
anyway… today… feh. so far, out of all the days that i have lived, this one sucked the most. okay, that’s not true. (which thereby negates my headline, but i don’t care.) in short: emotional crisis, work, newsletter, more work, home, more work, and then home again. with more random emotional crisis thrown in here and there for good measure. i sometimes wish i could truly be an insensitive bastard, which is probably a weird thing to say… but it’s said, so there. i get tired of feeling sometimes.
two bright points would be that i wrote a story i like and i got the firecracker chapbook in the mail today. the chapbook is absolutely beautiful, and if i were to make an intelligent-sounding comment about it, i would say that i love firecracker’s work because it is always so simple. it’s like verbal scaffolding reaching up to a place that you can’t quite see, but you know (sort of) what’s there. yeah, that statement may or may not have been intelligent afterall. in short, her words lead, but they don’t grab your hand and drag you kicking and screaming across the sidewalk to the place she wants you to go. and i truly appreciate that.
my story brought about a comment that compared me to raymond carver. this is the second time such a thing has happened, which sort of amazes me because i’ve never actually read any of his work. but i ordered a book of his today from amazon.com, so i guess that soon enough, i’ll see for myself who my work sometimes reminds people of.
okay… i’m in a mood to write, but i think i’m going to stop now. early morning meeting tomorrow. (the last one for the recreation millage committee. vote yes!)
