Dec 15 2003
right, a little less bitterness
ok, i was having a bad day on friday. but now i’m over it, as “over it” is something that i frequently am. so, without further ado, here’s another numbered list without the complete, all-consuming depression.
1. i’ve been making fudge for christmas. while it is a delightful pastime, and the peanut butter fudge borders on orgasmic, i’m not allowed to eat fudge anymore. actually, am not allowed to eat anything that tastes like anything anymore. will relearn my love of steamed vegetables without salt or butter and my hatred of things containing sugar. yes.
2. also, learned how to make caramel. am going to have to do pilates for five hours a day to counteract all the confectionary delights that have weaseled their way into my life.
3. city council meeting agenda for tonight is two pages long. am going to cry.
4. bought new jeans on saturday at express. i’m not really sure about the waistlines of jeans anymore. i mean, i definitely think the ones that come up over my ribcage are a little too high, but i just don’t get the point of no-rise jeans. not at all. anyway, express was having a sale, in which every pair of jeans in the store was $20 off. this of course meant that by the time i got there, the selection had been picked over, but i persevered and found a pair that worked okay. by “okay” i mean “i feel like a ho for owning them, but not as big a ho as britney spears must feel like every time she leaves the house, because at least my shirts hit the top of my pants.”
5. also got a fabulous pair of grey pants. fabulous. they look fabulous with this fabulous pair of black shoes i have, and ownership of them is, in its entirety, fabulous. and just for good measure, i will say fabulous a few more times: fabulous, fabulous, fabulous, fabulous. there. that word no longer has any meaning whatsoever.
6. have been reading bridget jones books again. v. good fun, esp. since am a neurotic love pariah.
7. how much time do you have to spend thinking about a person before you realize you’re insane?
8. also, i have not mailed out my christmas cards yet. i have a feeling i’m not going to get to this at all. oh well.
9. oh! although i am not allowed to have a puppy (bah!) i was told that i was allowed to have a pet pirate, as long as said pirate would wash dishes and wouldn’t mind vacuuming on occasion. how does one go about getting a pet pirate?
10. the most brilliant bit of conversation i’ve overheard in a crowded restaurant recently is this: “that’s not purple, dumbass.” “listen, it’s a proven fact that there are twelve different shades of purple. that, my friend, is purple.”
