Apr 30 2007
five years of blog: a retrospective
So, guess what, Internet? Today is the fifth anniversary of the day I started my blog! (And there was much rejoicing. Yaaay.) I never do a good job of writing anything on my blog’s birthday, because I’m never really sure what to write, or I forget that it is, in fact, my blog’s birthday. But since I have been at this for five whole years, I thought I would make an effort to make my blog feel special, now that it is officially old enough to start kindergarten. I’m kind of excited to have a school-aged blog, because I think this means I will be getting some awesome refrigerator art. Yeah.
Anyway, my blog was born sometime on April 30, 2002 (maybe April 29, but let’s just go with April 30). I was probably drunk. In fact, I’m certain I was drunk, since I don’t think there was a time in April 2002 when I wasn’t drunk, because back then, I pretty much had to drink all day long just to keep from having a nervous breakdown. (Hi, Ex-Boss! Yes, I was drunk at work. I’m sure that finally explains the filing system I set up for you.) My life was falling apart and I wanted to die, so it was a really happy time that I of course wanted to record for posterity. Except not. I don’t know what I would’ve told you my motivation was back then, but thinking about it now, I know that I was very, very angry and very, very afraid and very, very tired of having to wake up every morning and slog through the mess that my life had become — or just of having to wake up every morning, full stop — so I started writing about things that didn’t matter, just so that there could be something, anything that didn’t matter.
Well, that’s dramatic and kind of depressing, so let me assure you that it gets better. For one thing, I quit trying to drink myself to death, so there’s that. And the horrible mess that was my life at the time finally got sorted out. And I’m actually pretty happy about the way life is going right now. Also my hair looks really good. That helps, you know? Never underestimate the power of fabulous hair, I always say. I mean, if we can define “always” as “right before I typed that sentence.” Anyway.
I’ve deleted (or made private) most of the archives from when I started this blog, mainly because those posts don’t make for very good or entertaining reading, being mostly full of poisonous rage and drunken logic, so this isn’t a truly accurate number, but we’ll just pretend. In the five years since I started this blog, I have written 1,097 posts. At some point in there — I’m not sure exactly when — I figured out what I wanted my blog to be about and what voice I wanted to write it in, and then, hey, people started reading it. That’s my favorite part, you know, that you (yes, you) are here, reading this. I write all kinds of things that never see the light of day, but this is for you. Thank you for being here, and thank you for the 2,047 comments (since I migrated to WordPress in January 2006), and thank you for the emails (that I am still mostly horrible about replying to but I’m really trying to get better, I swear), and also thanks for all the fish. Wait, no. Nevermind about the fish part.
But the rest? I mean the rest. Let’s go have some cake. And while we’re having cake, let’s read some of my favorite posts from the past five years:
– hey! where yo’ man at?
– you’re nobody until somebody tells you to drop by the house and holla at him
– further adventures in service
– truth in advertising
– what comes after kung pao chicken, or my predictions for this year
– the thing about tampons
– pricelessness (one of my very favorite grandma posts)
– an open letter to the people who want to see me happily settled down with a nice young man so i can start having babies
– the conference call: a rant
– did you wash your pants in windex? because i can see myself in them
– a letter to a lost friend (even though it always makes me cry)
– an open letter to daylight savings time
– i am a clumsy oaf
– heart attacks: yum!
– the one about names
There are really so many more, but there’s this thing coming on The History Channel in a few minutes and I don’t want to miss it. I felt that I should let you know, in case you’d somehow forgotten what a total nerd I am. If I forgot your favorite, feel free to berate me. But berate me after you wish my blog a happy birthday… because 5. That’s a milestone. I never would’ve thought I’d still be doing this, but then, most of my life is composed of things I never would’ve thought I’d do or be doing, so, in the words of my favorite person on earth (ahem), “I’m not surprised.”
Wow … Kindergarten already? It seems just like yesterday that your blog was potty trained. At least you will still have your plant babies to keep you busy while Jamelah.net is in school. I sort of want to see some of the poisonous rage and drunken logic … you know, for old time’s sake. Also I have to say some of my favorite blog moments have been during the Blogathon — but I’m glad you don’t have an endgame, Billy.
I know… how quickly time flies. I forgot about my plant babies! I am a terrible mother!
five.
that’s amazing. congratulations!
and while we’re celebrating, my inner five year old has been hiding under the bed since your current boyfriend season banner is gawking up there. Is there chance of feng shui-ing that space?
maybe a little refrigerator art?
thank you, jam. i love swee pea
Happy birthday, Jamelah.net. That other Jamelah never had a chance, really. (Though you have to love the model boxing business.) Birthday spanking!
Happy birthday, Jamelah’s blog.
I still remember when you started it, and you and Caryn started talking “blog-speak” and I didn’t know what the hell either of you were talking about. Well, actually most of the time I still don’t.
happy blog day! I don’t know how I stumbled upon Jamelah.net but I’m so so so happy I did. And go Michigan! As in, state of.
Delurking again to wish jamelah.net many happy returns (comments) of the day!
Happy Birthday, Jamelah’s blog!
Happy blog birthday. I’m glad your blog didn’t stay drunk and angry. That’s not much fun … unless you’re Clint Eastwood or something. You’re not Clint Eastwood, are you?
Yea Jam’s blog. [Insert sound of paper party thingy that curls out when you blow it.]
ps.
I noticed to my old and aging eyes that the black type of the post links was really easier to read than the gray type. Why not make the main post easier to read by making it black?
Happy Blogiversary, or something.
nice going, jamelah’s blog!
it is bad enough trying to keep ahead of your current blog postings via google reader, and now i have to read these posts too? but … then i may never feel the sun on my face or the wind in my hair.
but hey, at least i will be laughing. and memorising your lines so i can say them in public and make other people laugh and be my friends and buy me chocolate.
happy day of birth, jamelablog. may there be many more years of jamelah to come.
happy belated birthday to your blog! for the last five years, i have known that i could always find you in cyberspace. i have issues with the word cyberspace (or is it two words?), but whatever. it’s good to see your wife written in words.
Thanks all for the birthday well-wishes. My blog went out and partied it up so hard that it’s been passed out for a few days, but it’ll be back at ‘em in no time.
yer welcome. truly, it’s my pleasure.
happy happy birthday! this blog quickly became one of my favorites, so now i’m dorkily excited to go read some archives. keep up the excellent work, and don’t get in any trouble.
[…] Dudes, my blog is six. I wrote a big ol’ retrospective post last year, so I figure it would be silly to do it again, just one year later. In terms of blogging, it’s been a rocky year, with me being too busy to post much while I was in Arabic Camp, then me posting some stuff whenever I felt like it because I was out of Arabic Camp and also unemployed, to me posting all the damn time because I was insane and I signed up for NaBloPoMo, then… whatever it’s been over the past few months. Sporadic, I guess you’d say. […]