Yay! Who doesn’t love quizzes?
1. I accompanied Missy to her appointment with her oncologist.
a. True
b. False
2. Totally without warning, Missy busted out with a sex question, but that’s okay because it’s not like I’m a prude or anything.
a. True
b. False
3. Tearing membranes, chewing, breaking teeth.
a. Dinner at Hannibal Lecter’s House.
b. The oncologist’s instructions for things not to do during sex while on chemo.
c. That one night I’m never ever talking about, ever.
4. You should be sure your partner is free of infection and disease.
a. Good advice for anyone, really.
b. Something that only sissies do.
c. What the oncologist said while looking RIGHT AT ME and I was all “Hey, wait a minute, Mister Doctor Man, it’s not like I’m some sort of disease-ridden skank.” And also, “Hey, wait a minute, Mister Doctor Man, Missy and I are friends, true, but we’re not that kind of friends.”
d. Both a & d.
5. There was a lot of repeating how tearing membranes was bad, and every time the phrase “tearing membranes” was repeated, it went with the following hand motion:
a. True
b. False
6. WTF?
a. Yeah
b. Exactly
c. Both a & b.
7. And then he talked about it for the next 10 minutes.
a. True
b. False
8. Italians are more likely to break each other’s teeth while kissing because they are so fiery and passionate.
a. What?
b. No, he totally said that.
c. I made out with an Italian once and nobody broke anybody else’s teeth.
d. All of the above.
9. And he totally thought we were going to get it on as soon as we got to the parking lot.
a. True
b. False
c. Probably
10. I don’t really have anything to put here, but I feel like this quiz (of sorts) needs a 10, so, hey… yeah, pretty awkward, right?
a. Right
b. Not right
Answers: 1. a.; 2. a.; 3. b.; 4. d.; 5. a.; 6. c.; 7. a.; 8. d.; 9. c.; 10. a.
jamelah.net 
Firstly, I’m going to have dark dreams about that hand motion and this whole “tearing of membranes” bit. Good lord. Are there really THAT many membranes left to tear, one wonders?
Secondly, I have nothing helpful to add to the uncomfortable and awkward situation referenced above, except that 1. Being a patient sucks ass
2. Mister Doctor Man is a creep 3. I, too, have made out with several Italians (not all at once, mind) and managed to preserve most, if not all of my teeth. And membranes for that matter.
Sending a bit of virtual hugging your way and on to Missy. She’s going to tear this cancer’s figurative membrane, I just know it. (hand motion)
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11. the doctor totally went home and spaked his…manly bits, much like i’m spanking the ass of cancer
a. true
b. false
c. as soon as we left the office
d. in the car
e. had some class and waited until he got home, pretended to take a shower and a.
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good quiz. i think i aced it.
and you survived the real version, and missy forged on ahead with her questions no matter how many teeth got in her way.
p.s. – lemon grass tea! lots of it.
and good friends
best to you and missy and the rest of the gang
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Question #4 has an infinite loop in it that is causing me some brain problems.
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And go Missy! Tear cancer’s membranes a new one!
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I just wanted to let you know that this weblog is being featured on Five Star Friday! http://www.schmutzie.com/fivestarfriday/2011/3/25/five-star-fridays-142nd-edition-is-brought-to-you-by-seth-go.html
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Linda — I think it might’ve been not horrible if he had answered the question and then moved on instead of answering it nonstop for 10 minutes. Okay, we understand. No tearing membranes or breaking teeth. Got it. PLEASE STOP TALKING ABOUT IT. (Breaking teeth? Really?)
Missy — Well, friend, I am going to pick e.
Judih — It’s always good to ace a quiz on a Friday, I think. Also hi… been thinking about you.
srah — Hah. Obviously by “both a & d” I meant “both a & c” but I was tired. And I figure I’ll just leave it, because I like infinite loops. Also, yes, go Missy!
schmutzie — Cool. Thanks! And thanks to the person that submitted the link!
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That doctor clearly has … issues. Breaking teeth? Really?
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Really. Breaking teeth. I’ve never heard of such a thing, but the way the doctor kept looking at me when he warned against it led me to believe that I look like the sort of person that’s going to bust the hell out of someone’s teeth. Nice.
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Okay, that hand gesture video? That was pretty good. You looked just like a real doctor. Did you ever think about medical school? Because you’ve got the hand gestures down.
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