the thankful list, 2013

Oh hello. Once again, I figure I should at least keep up with annual tradition posts, even if now my blog is dead. Having written that sentence, I realize it doesn’t make any sense, because if my blog is dead, there’s really no point in keeping up with any posts, but I’m fine with nonsense. It’s a good time to think about being thankful, not so much because it’s a holiday dedicated to that sort of thing, but because I’ve been pretty cranky lately, and… eh, might as well de-crank, if only for a few paragraphs.

So.

Right now, I am thankful for my grandmother, even if every conversation we have always devolves into why I’m not married, but I can’t get married because then she wouldn’t have anything to say to me. She’s 99, and I go visit her (mostly) every Sunday, and I often look at a picture of her from when she first moved into assisted living and think about how, even in just a couple of years, she is so completely different. She’s still an amazing lady, just a different amazing lady than the one who helped raise me (except for when she tells me I should lose weight or brush my hair, because then she’s exactly the same as always). I’m thankful she was able to come spend Thanksgiving in my house today.

I’m thankful for my job, which is totally different than what it was a year ago. It’s much harder than I thought it would be, and I have had to learn so many things. When I was younger, if anyone told me that I’d spend a lot of time thinking about data and training people how to use software, I would’ve laughed and laughed. Honestly, I thought I’d be some kind of artist. And I’m no kind of artist, but even though it’s about computery stuff most of the time, I do appreciate how creative I have the room to be. The downside is that now I spend time thinking about work when I’m not working. Even this afternoon during dinner, people were talking about normal things, and I was thinking about drop down menus and reports. I need to get out more.

And I’m thankful that the insurance I have through work isn’t all judgey and will pay for birth control. I’ve had a hell of a year, health-wise, and last November I was prescribed hormonal birth control because I suddenly started bleeding all the time, which is both terribly unpleasant and too much information, but I can’t think of anything I hate more than neverending periods. Talk about my idea of hell. (While I’m being all TMI, let me go ahead and share that this past summer I bled for 3 weeks straight, but I didn’t drive myself off a cliff. I AM A SURVIVOR, PEOPLE.) Anyway, it’s been a lot of ups and downs, hormone-wise, but I think I’m finally on a pill that both keeps it in my uterus (until placebo week, at least) and doesn’t make me cry non-stop, so that’s a win. The funny part about having gone through so many hormonal changes is that my hair has turned completely straight as a board. But only in one spot. Because if it were straight all over, then it wouldn’t be the communist hair that I am known for.

While on the subject of my health, I’m thankful I don’t have cancer. I’m sure I’ve mentioned that, but it bears repeating.

This has nothing to do with anything, but I’m thankful for that feature on Facebook where you can hide all of another person’s posts. Brilliant, that.

I wish I could be thankful for lovely weather, but it’s cold and snowy which is not lovely. I’m straying. Um. I’m thankful that I haven’t had to drive to work in any blizzards this year. Yet.

I’m thankful for my bathroom. Earlier this year, I was in the basement and noticed water dripping from the ceiling, which was the floor right underneath my bathtub and I thought something along the lines of “Well, fuck.” A couple of weeks ago, a contractor came in and put in a new floor, walls, shower, everything. It’s very peaceful in there, and I also don’t have to worry about falling through the floor into the basement every time I shower, which is a definite bonus. The house is mostly put back together now, and I’m really thankful that everything is working and okay and all in one room. I’m so thankful I don’t have to brush my teeth in the kitchen anymore.

I’m thankful for road trips with friends, having co-workers who get my Monty Python references, the candy basket in the tech room (though maybe I shouldn’t be thankful for that because Starburst is like fruit-flavored crack and I think I have a problem), wine after work, cuddles with Sweet Pea, lazy Sunday afternoons doing nothing but watching Doctor Who (except now I’m caught up now and I guess I need a new Sunday afternoon show), all the times my morning oatmeal doesn’t boil over in the microwave at work, trips to Sephora for things that sparkle, that it’s only going to be like 6 months until it gets warm again, mashed potatoes with lots of butter, and chap stick.

It’s been a tough year, but I’m stubborn enough to keep on going. That’s reason to be thankful, I think. And when I’m not cranky, I am. Thankful.